Hello. I am Troubled Eater's sister and because I have pull with her,
I want to share with the world my distaste for Jello. I understand
that at this point some of you are thinking "Jello? Who hates Jello?"
but I ask you, what is there to really like about Jello? Are you sure
you like Jello?
First of all, the obvious, is Jello jiggles. The Jello company tries
to capitalize on this fact and has a money making campaign for Jello
jigglers. Why do you want to eat something that jiggles? Do you know
what else jiggles? Things that are alive. Like insects. Insects
jiggle, but nobody wants to eat them. I want my food solid.
Unmoving. Constant.
Secondly, the flavor is not appetizing. It doesn't taste like any cherry,
lime or lemon I have ever eaten. I'm sure you have seen them, those
cakes where people drill holes into a perfectly beautiful dessert and
ruin it with puddles of artificial flavor.
Finally, the opportunity for integrating other foods into the jello
truly bothers me. My relationship with Jello ended when I ate green
jello with carrots in it. Later that night I became sick and vomited.
I didn't enjoy the green Jello with carrots the first or second time
in my mouth. Why carrots? Why bananas? Why take solid food and
suspend it in a murky semi-solid substance rumored to be made with cow
bones?
There is so much I don't understand about Jello and those who like it.
I may not be as picky of an eater as my sister, but Jello truly is
disturbing to me and I want to encourage you to reevaluate your
relationship with Jello. It is okay to not like this "food" and you
are not alone.
Thank you for letting me give a voice to those who of us out there who
feel queasy when within a short distance of this sad excuse for a side
dish.
Posts
I agree with you completely- Jello is just gross. I don't understand the fascination with it. And don't get me started on solid foods mixed in. I think part of my revulsion may be because we only ate it if we had the stomach flu.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the guest post, Not as Troubled Eater!
It was a way to get you to eat carrots.
ReplyDeleteAnd I hope both of you have to eat that gross olive jello. Serves you right.
Mom
PS you LOVED jello at the time and I was trying to make it more nutritious.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am sick and tired of listening to you two complain about my parenting!!!
This is hillarious. I can think of all kinds of ways to make jello more exciting. Make it in a fish mold and put salmon in it. :-) Mmm, Mmm, Mmm. HA
ReplyDeleteI do not share this hatred for Jello. However, I couldn't really tell you the last time I ate Jello, or the last time I thought "hmm...some jello would really hit the spot" I remember eating Jello Jigglers as a kid and thinking they were awesome. I do agree that mixing stuff into Jello is just disgusting. I hope you two like pudding, otherwise you guys will never survive the nursing home when your old geezers.
ReplyDeleteWhile I am not a picky eater, I must say that Jello lost its appeal for me when I came to realize what it is MADE OF. GROSS.
ReplyDelete